


Need You Now

by KillerKells202



Series: Moral Injury [5]
Category: RWBY
Genre: Alcohol, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Angst with a Happy Ending, Anxiety, Author Is Sleep Deprived, Breaking Up & Making Up, F/F, Happy Ending, Illusions, Loneliness, Love, Mental Breakdown, Post-War, Reminiscing, Sleep Deprivation, Sleepy Cuddles, Suicidal Thoughts, Suicide Attempt, Unhealthy Coping Mechanisms
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-11-22
Updated: 2019-11-22
Packaged: 2021-02-18 02:40:13
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,248
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21520519
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/KillerKells202/pseuds/KillerKells202
Summary: Yang tries to cope with Blake leaving. Her wife has been gone for a month with no contact. She leaves Blake a voicemail about how much she loves and misses her. Maybe her wife will answer the call to her heart, maybe she'll leave Yang to her nightmares
Relationships: Blake Belladonna/Yang Xiao Long
Series: Moral Injury [5]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1376032
Comments: 10
Kudos: 81





	Need You Now

Yang sat there in the hallway of their house. Blake walked out on her with no plans of returning. She went to stay with her parents until things between them were cooler. Lately, all they had been doing was arguing. Since Yang came back, Blake’s changed into a different person. Blake’s felt the same. Yang used to be able to open up to her, talk about anything. Once she got back, Yang isolated herself. She insisted Blake didn’t have to worry. It drove them apart. It wasn’t easy for Blake to open up to her, but Yang found it hard to talk to her. The roles reversed.

Yang kept staring at the contact on her screen. Another fight with her lover, and this time, Blake walked out. Her wife was done with the bullshit, the lies, the empty words of _I'm fine_ when Yang wasn't okay. They both knew it. There was only so much she could take. Lilac eyes glued to the screen. The blonde had a whiskey bottle beside her. She wasn't sure how much she drank. She didn't care. 

Yang wasn't able to keep a consistent sleep schedule. There was no reason for her to leave the bed. The nightmares haunt her, the absence of her wife offering no protection. She barely ate most days. Yang didn’t have the energy to feel. Life proved hopeless. Blake didn’t need her. Blake married a partner, not a burden.

Yang held a Nineteen-Eleven Taurus. Yang held a Nineteen-Eleven Taurus. The weapon flipped in her hand. She pointed it at her throat, under her chin, rested her forehead against the barrel. Yang had no desire to die like this. She survived the war.

She sat there, lifeless. She drove Blake away. When the nightmares came, or the shadow figures, she didn’t fight them anymore. Yang wished to die by their hand. Even as she held the gun, she didn’t want to die by her hand.

Her mind was made up. She took out the magazine and cleared the weapon. She wanted to live. Why would the thought of dying cross her mind? Yang put the gun away. 

"Fuck it." Yang hit the call button. It's been too long since she last heard from her. If it was up to Blake, she'd still continue to ignore her. It was up to Yang to make that first move. She pulled out her scroll, calling her wife. 

\---Meanwhile---

Blake looked at all the pictures she had of the two of them. Even ones with both their families. A couple of just Blake's family, a few with Yang's and several of all of them together, mostly for the holidays wearing hats and bright smiles. Blake smiled sadly. She missed those days. 

When did it all get so bad? When did it all go so wrong? Would this be the end for them? It couldn't be, could it, would it?

The brunette sighed. She didn't want it to be over between them. It was clear that Yang wouldn't get help. She refused to let anyone in or acknowledge anything was wrong.

It was painful to watch as Yang was slowing chipping away at her former self, becoming more isolated. She claimed nothing was wrong. It's easier than mentioning what's bothering her. Blake wanted to help, but there was only so much she could do. Yang refused to talk to her or anyone who could help. It was too painful for her to watch. She had to leave. Either Yang would talk to her, seek assistant, or it was over for them. She was tired of putting one hundred percent of herself in to get nothing in return. She wasn’t like Yang. She had patience, but only so much it before she snapped. Blake took a while to open up to her, but they were married now. Before, they were friends. 

She didn't want it to be over. She loved Yang with everything she had. Her old room was too lonely, too cold with not enough light, only elements her sunny dragon could provide.

Yang pressed the call button. Yang shook her leg with anxiousness. She wasn't sure if Blake would answer or not. 

"Hey, sorry I missed your call. Leave a message." 

Even if it was an answering machine, Yang felt relieved hearing her voice. "Hey, it's me. Blake, I've been thinking about everything. I don't know. I just miss you so much." Fingers pressed to her eyes as she tried not to cry. "Give me a call back when you can. I love you." Yang hung up. All she would do now was wait. 

Blake paced in her room. There was no doubt her mom could hear her. Her back and forth movement set the pace of her mind. Yang tried to reach out. It was her turn. Did she ignore her, call back, what? Her hands laced through her hair as she thought about Yang's message and what she meant.

Yang sat in the hall of their house. She had Belladonna's at her feet for when Blake returned if she returned. She held onto hope. If that was extinguished, there'd be nothing left. Yang took another swig.

Blake had worn herself down and sat on the bed. Her hands covered her face as she thought about what to do. Her eyes caught the pictures. Every picture of them together is right in front of her. Of course, she didn't want this to end, but she couldn't keep going like this. Her hand went to her scroll. She was strong and stubborn, but listening to Yang call her first, put forth the effort, it dropped her defenses.

Blake sat there wondering if Yang thought about her. How much and how often. Blake sat there, wondering if Yang thought about her. How much and how often. While she was gone, Yang called every so often, until there was a period when all calls stopped. Did Yang think about her? She was thinking about her now since Blake walked out. When did she start thinking about her beforehand? This didn't have to escalate if Yang thought about what this was doing to her. 

For Blake there wasn't a second she didn't think about Yang. Everything she did brought her right back. She wanted to continue being there for her. Even her parents were warning her their relationship was destroying her. She cares too much for the one person she's attached to. It wasn't healthy. She had to separate herself.

Exhausted, Blake fell back on her bed. She looked at the time. It was nearly one-thirty or zero dark thirty in the morning as Yang would call it. She was too lonely. Her old room was too cold. There wasn't even light around her, even if she could see in the dark. She was alone. She needed Yang. She needed Yang beside her, holding her.

Blake's hand went to her scroll. Yang's number was the first to pop up, saved as a favorite. She couldn't do this anymore. It'd been close to a month. She couldn't continue to be without her wife. She couldn't continue to live separate lives. The only person she wanted was Yang, her Yang. The Yang that left before her deployment. She's always needed her.

She said she wouldn't call. There was nothing she desired more. She's lost control of her thoughts. Only Yang could keep her from catastrophizing anything. She wasn't sure how she did anything before having Yang in her life. Now, she needed her more than anything.

\---

Yang took another shot, drinking directly from the bottle. Her uncle would be proud. She couldn't stop looking at the door. For a whole month, she focused on the door. Her hope of Blake sweeping in as she did before. After she left the first time, it nearly took a year, but Blake came through. Yang remembers seeing her safe, holding her for the longest.

Yang sat there wondering if Blake ever thought about her. To Yang, Blake was always on her mind. The reason she was able to make it back is because of Blake. She promised to make it back to her, maybe not in one piece, but she made it back. Her hand slammed against the floor. She was stupid. Blake was suffering because of her stubbornness. Blake deserved better. Yang deserved to be left. Not even her mother wanted her. As much as she loved Blake and how much her wife was on her mind, Yang took her for granted. Tears fell from her eyes.

She pressed a button on her scroll. The display clock told her it was one-thirty in the morning. Good news, it was a weekend so she could relax. Positive news, her command would not find out about Blake's disappearance. She could continue making money, living in the house instead of a barracks room. Sadly, she only had this house because of Blake. Her wife made it home. Without her, it was an empty building. She took another swig, a failed attempt at drowning her sorrows.

As she sat in the hallway, Blake as her only focus. Her bottled more than halfway gone. Her wife consumed her mind, unhealthy as it sounded. She missed her like crazy. Yang wanted nothing more than to go to her. Some sober part of her mind thought better of it. She was too drunk to go anywhere. Blake left because she needed time and peace. Yang would allow her to have it without running interference. She's done all she can by calling and leaving a message. The rest was up to Blake, whatever her wife wanted, Yang would support, even if she didn't like it. Blake needed to do what was best for her.

As she sat in her room, deciding sleep wasn't going to come, Blake hopped to her feet. She put on her long black coat and left. The Faunus nearly walked out the door. She didn't-after the last time she left, she hugged her parents goodbye. Her mom gave her a smile whispering the words _go get her_. Blake couldn't help but smile in return. She left out the front door, stepping into her car and drove. She couldn't live without the person she loves the most. Leaving her by herself was a mistake. She should've forced Yang to get help instead.

When she pulled into the driveway, she didn't wish to announce her presence. The old Blake would've changed her mind and drove away. Blake refused to leave her alone any longer. She opened the door slowly to get her bearings. "Yang?" She called out. Only the hallway light from upstairs is on. 

Yang pulled her legs closer to her chest. It was another Blake coming to haunt her again. How many times has she imagined this already? She was never strong enough to fight them off. She missed her dearly. She never wanted one to vanish. They always left her alone. She stayed silent and still. Tears poured from her eyes. She supposed the hurt was better than nothing. That's what people said anyway. Footsteps creaked as they came up the stairs. It was only a matter of time until she was spotted. "Yang!" Blake saw her curled into a corner of the hall. She couldn't but run to her. Their embrace was awkward as Yang held herself. Slowly, Yang's arms wrapped around her. 

"You feel so real." She whispered, nuzzling into her form. She wouldn't let this one go. 

Blake felt her heart shatter. Yang thought she was a mirage. Maybe even haunted by a figment. Her drunk state certainly didn't help. "Yang, it's me. I'm here. I'm not going anywhere. I should've never left you alone. I'm sorry. I'm so sorry." 

Her words chocked as she tried to speak. "Please go away. It hurts to wake up in the morning, and you're gone." Despite her words, she clung tighter.

"It's me, Yang, I promise. I'm here this time. When she adjusted herself, something she hit slid across the floor. Her eyes glanced at it. A gun. Yang's .45 caliber. Was she? No. Yang wouldn't do that. Even with the stink of alcohol in her system. 

Yang was too tired, too empty to feel or do much of anything. Another Blake came to haunt her. This time, she felt surreal. Blake promised she wouldn't leave her a few months after reuniting from the first time she left. Imaginary or not, this Blake was the last thread she had. 

"Let's get you to bed." Blake brought her soldier up to her feet, held her close as she half-dragged her their bed. 

Yang flopped down without a fight. She stared into the ceiling as if unsure about her position. "How will I know you'll be here in the morning?" Her voice was slow, slurred, quiet as she spoke. She knew the Faunus had sensitive hearing.

"Come here." Blake spoke gently, wrapping Yang's arms around her. She knew Yang would know what to do, even in her current state. It's a position they've had years of practice. The brute pulled their bodies closer to one another. 

Yang couldn't help but stroke her hair, feeling the warmth of her skin. She felt incredibly real. Laying there, Blake forgot how much she needed her. How much Yang needed her. Yang was all she needed. Why didn't she see that before? It didn't matter. She had Yang, that's what mattered. Yang was hers. All she needed was her.

**Author's Note:**

> I'm glad I found this. I was worried I deleted it. I did, but I found it in my recycle bin. Here you all are, part 5 of my Angst series. I wrote this instead of sleeping because I felt sad and needed to do something to express myself.


End file.
